The Self I Accustom To
Through my Self Portrait Series, I delve into the intricate layers of my existence. Confidence in my own skin wasn't always innate, but as time unfolded, I discovered the profound complexity that defines me. I realized that my physical appearance is merely a facet of the multifaceted whole. An aspect shown Capturing images of myself through photography, a process in which I am both subject and photographer, becomes a profound exploration of my current state. This personal visual narrative serves as a powerful antidote to the anxiety that can accompany interactions with others, allowing me to fully embrace and embody the richness of my being.
First self portrait on film Est. 2016
What happens when I take myself out of context, out of the present reality and step into a figure? The woman I can envision but do not feel in my skin. Living in a different time, in another mind, in another light.
In these photos exists the woman I’m thought to be but has not come to see. Accentuating my physical features such as my hair, my skin, and my face. The external factors that have built up the image of Katarina. Subconsciously making myself an object of desire.
An image I feel distant from but crave to have a taste.
Material Girl
She’s that pretty girl with that pretty face
Listening to the opinions that build her case
Feeling disconnected
From the words she so often hears
She questions her reality
That seems impossible to adhere
Connecting her worth
To the affection she gravitates
Leaving the makeup of the mind
In the sweet little hands that dominate
Unleash What’s Inside of Me
Covered and hidden
I’ve laid with full straps
Unaware of a fellow
That once felt trapped
Somber and cold
With no place to go
4 walls on each side
all covered in gold
No longer perfect
No longer enclosed
Cause what we used to know
Could only hold us for so long
Awaken my friend
Awaken at last
For you wander upon
A sea of glass
Nake the Eye and Unwind the Mind
I am not who you want me to be
Relinquish your desires of me
Strip your perceptions
Keep them scattered and loose
For what you perceive,
Is only fractions of the truth
Nake the eye
For there will be
Much you wish not to see
Much you will find hard to believe
Maybe you will find
A pure reflection
Of that, you wish not to be
A facet piled on like a grave
That only your mind can see
Where Is My Femininity?
A push to the cushion
that held us upright
Muddled in emotions
My chest sank with each motion
Too aware of the thoughts
That traveled from ear to ear
I pranced around in fear
Awaiting your permission
So careful and sweet
I cautioned your retreat
We played the game
Of hide and go seek
Searching for the deepest companion
Who withered at every leap
In these sheets
fell my poor sleep
reminded of the times
It failed that boy E
Willing but unable
to capture the breeze
That traveled between you and me
